The young and the restless and big-haired

Wait, Cookie has a personal life? Enough to write a blog about, even considering the extremely low standards a life must meet in order to be blogged? You mean she’s not just a prop in a bright sweater, acting as a foil for Dagwood’s crazy antics?

I didn’t even know her name until I looked it up, and I’ve been snidely reading the damn strip for years. But I like this idea of Cookie leaving the purview of the fourth wall and going off on her own, coming back occasionally just to take part in the family’s zany moments. This might be a blog worth reading.

April 1: Today I asked daddy if he’d like to take a nap, and he said no -- because he’d like to take two! Oh, that daddy!

April 17: OMG! You know that guy Todd from my geometry class, the one that’s really cute but I’m always too nervous to talk to? Today at lunch, he came over to me and said, “Hey, I hear you give great head. Want to come over to my place, do some heroin and then act as my sex slave?” Oh, that Todd! I told him I’d do it tomorrow.

April 18: This morning was so funny! Daddy’s carpool was sitting outside the house honking the horn, and meanwhile daddy was quickly scarfing down his breakfast. He ran out so fast, he almost forgot to open the door! Oh, that daddy! After that, I went over to Todd’s place. The heroin was pretty good, but then he took out some handcuffs and I must have blacked out. I woke up this afternoon on the side of some road, in a pile of my own vomit. I hope it comes out in the wash -- I was wearing my favorite sweater!

April 24: I’m confused about Todd. We’ve gone out on a few more dates, but they often end with me waking up somewhere scary and having to call a cab. I think he likes me, but I can’t tell. I decided to ask daddy what he thinks -- but he was asleep on the couch! And it wasn’t even bedtime yet! Oh, that daddy!

Posted by Jason Feifer at April 24, 2006 12:21 PM