dirty laundry.

where life is hung out to dry.

ISSUE ONE
released 11.05.02

Please note: every name in every letter is fake. This is not a cunning attempt to fool you, but is intended to strike a balance between anonymous writers and a comfortable letter-writing format. Letters must be addressed and signed, but that can not be done by the actual writers or addressees. Such was the dilemma. Fake names was the solution.

Here is the issue. Enjoy.


1. On the bus to you, to anyone
I feel like a walking vagina. No, worse. I feel like a walking hole.

2. Age-old advice from your ill-respected elder
I wish I could be around when you're older. I would love to watch you.

3. All quiet on the homefront
So what if I'm not a normal college roommate? I think I am.

4. You gave me an F and this is what I have to say about it
I could have been sleeping, you know.

5. Culture-clash of pronouns
My mother says I have a baby face, and my father always went light on me when we wrestled.

6. A dark deal for the boys in blue
For the record, I don't want to give you your coffee for free, but I feel forced to.

7. Things that don't go bump in the night
I know what you do when I go to bed. I'm not stupid, you know.

8. To the guy who looks like Steve Buscemi
You must get this a lot. I mean, not THIS.

9. Love, sans mute
I've never met you, but while living above you in this ramshackle apartment, we have shared too many intimate moments.

10. Repeating yourself like clockwork
I know you clocked your watch. You've told me. You told me the first day I met you.

11. So much horsepower for so little respect
I don't know why I ever filled out an application to work at this dealership, but it is a constant reminder of what I lack.

...also, view the cover art.


Hard copies obtained here.

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